Where No Oxen Are, The Trough Is Clean

A verse often written on the whiteboard in my kitchen: “Where no oxen are, the trough is clean; but much increase comes by the strength of an ox.” (Proverbs 14:4). The lesson for me as a mother? Kids are messy, but the treasure that they are vastly outweighs the mess that comes along with them.

The Lord has been kind to teach me that a consistently, perfectly clean and organized home is nothing but an idol of my own heart. The mess comes along with having littles and my contentment is found in Christ, not in the tidiness of my home.

This by no means is an excuse for laziness on my part, as we learn in Proverbs 31, the virtuous wife “suffers nothing from laziness.”

What does suffering from laziness look like? It takes many forms, of course, but the first example that comes to mind is my toddler tracking dog poop through the house one time when I failed to pick up the yard before we went out to play. Scrubbing poop off the floor of the entire house = suffering from my own laziness.

But the constant trickle (or flood) of toys being left on the floor, dishes tossed in the sink, or laundry piling up isn’t a result of my laziness. It simply comes with the territory. And when the end of the day comes and every toy hasn’t been put back in it’s proper place or there is still a basket of unfolded laundry sitting on my bed, I need to be okay with my messy trough.

Of course, the Lord has also been gracious to help me learn to be more creative in my approach to the daily upkeep of my home. There are certain “jobs” that my kids love to do: vacuuming with the cordless vacuum, spraying and wiping windows with vinegar water, and for my oldest daughter who loves things to be just-so, folding towels tri-fold style.

Some days my girls love to pitch in and some days they need a little more convincing and I put a timer on and we race around having a “clean-up party”. Does every crumb get vacuumed and every book get put back on the shelf binder-out? No. But I’m comforted knowing that my girls are learning how to work as a team for the greater good and enjoying the satisfaction of a job well done.

A lesson from Martha and Mary

Luke 10:38-42 sends a convicting message to busy women, like me, who sometimes lose sight of what’s truly important because we’re fussing over the trivial tasks. Of course, these tasks are a necessary part of our day, but I need to constantly remind myself to put them in their proper place.

“As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, ‘Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!’ ‘Martha, Martha,’ the Lord answered, ‘you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed – or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.'”

In the busyness of caring for our households, it’s important to prioritize and not be swept away by trivial matters. What’s truly important is our relationship with the Lord, our relationship with our husbands, children, and others. Our own growing to know the Lord more and helping those in our life to know Him more. When we put Him first, He promises that the rest will fall into place.

“But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” – Matthew 6:33