Carefully Consider Your Ways

In the book of Haggai, we see the Lord exhort his people multiple times to give careful thought to their ways; to carefully consider their actions and the consequences of them. This call to critical thinking, self-examination and evaluation is so important in our Christian walk. I’ve found it particularly helpful in pin-pointing my motives behind certain behaviors.

For example, there was one night that I walked out of the baby’s room, after a midnight wake-up, feeling puffed up and patting myself on the back for being so selfless and motivated by love to care for my little one. And only a few hours later, I found myself despairing because of the ugliness I’d shown some of my older children when I went in and whisper-yelled at them to go back to bed because it was 5:30am. When I carefully considered my harshness, I knew it was not motivated by love—but instead by selfishness. I enjoy my coffee time in quietness and with no little people before 6:00am.

This unloving response to my children was also motivated by fear; if I let them get up at 5:30 today, they’ll always get up at 5:30 and I’ll never have a quiet moment with coffee again! I remember when my oldest daughter was potty training and fear was behind some of my harsh overreactions to accidents. The subtle whisper in my mind was she will never be potty trained! How important it is to “take captive every thought” (see 2 Corinthians 10:5)! Now as I potty train my third child, I’m able to quiet those fearful lies and respond instead with grace and encouragement.

Fear is a Liar

Unless it’s the godly fear of the Lord (humbly standing in awe of Him), then whenever I find my motives are grounded in fear I remind myself of 2 Timothy 1:7, “For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.”

The “spirit of fear” is not from the Lord. Fear lies to us. It’s a tactic of our enemy to mask deception and to keep us blind to his work. If we’re paying close attention, carefully considering the thoughts that run through our mind in a day, I bet we can hear the subtle whispers disguised as fear many times in one day.

Fear can be behind resentment towards our spouse when they have to leave for a work conference or drill weekend. Or behind our inability to share the gospel with unbelieving family members who we’re sure will call us crazy to our face (especially because they had a front row seat to all of our mistakes!)

The antidote for this kind of fear? Turn it over to the Lord. Underneath our fear is a lack of faith; trusting that God is our loving Father who cares about all the details of our life. We can repent of this faithlessness, turn from it, and look to our Father for help. Potty training and night-waking aren’t too small to bring to the Lord. Disability, marital problems, addiction… nothing is too great to bring to the Lord.

“Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken.”
‭Psalms‬ ‭55‬:‭22‬ ‭

When our gauge isn’t working

Of course, I can deceive myself into thinking my motives are righteous when they’re not. It’s been absolutely helpful to get in the practice of checking my motives but I know I wont always be perfect at it. That’s why the following is a constant prayer of my heart, which I know to be deceitful and desperately wicked (Jeremiah 17:9), if left unchecked.

“Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life.” – Psalms 139:23-24

David, who penned the above (inspired by God, as is all of Scripture) is called “a man after God’s own heart”, (see Acts 13:22) not because he’s perfect, but because he has a repentant heart, recognizes his need for God, and submits to Him.

Likewise, when the Lord convicts me of a wrong motive, I know the next step is simple (not easy). Repent. Immediately. If I wait, the sinful human tendency to justify will set in. I’ve learned (and am still learning, God is not done with me, thankfully) to turn conviction into immediate action by repenting— acknowledging my sin before God and seeking His power to turn from it. When I do, He is so faithful to forgive and strengthen me to be able to resist the temptation in the future.

The bottom line is this, at the heart of our motives, are we seeking to please God? Our selfish desires? Other people? In Matthew 22:37, Jesus tells us, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.” Carefully considering the inner motives of our heart will help us stay focused on what truly matters.